It’s unavoidable to take a huge amount of data, excerpt one universal denominator, and mark it as a stereotype. The thing is, stereotypes are a broad generalization, but we can’t shove them away because we don’t like them. I mean, you’ve heard the most common stereotypes about people, men, and women, so it’s pointless for me to repeat them. However, I’ve found some things about the attraction that seems curious enough, and true in their own bubble. I’ve found that women usually see bad boys as attractive, something like a challenge to domesticate a wild beast, react to unpredictability, insert the control. The idea of growing something, building someone’s character, nurturing, and teaching good behavior is something tied to the most basic principles, something that remains in sub-conscience in the women’s mind to search for a crying kid in the group, and take care of it. Now, I am not saying this is the same with everyone, but I am seeing glimpses of it in every women’s character. Speaking of bad boys, guys who drink, run wild, have no attachments, carelessly spend their money, and violently react to things, they are somewhat a challenge to pacify them, teach them to follow the tempo, and respond to commands. I know, it sounds like training a dog, but that’s the correlation.
On the other hand, men, feel attracted to an image of innocence, fragility, along the line of finding someone to protect and care for. It’s something similar to the girl’s attraction, but it’s slightly different. There’s also a thing with crazy chicks, girls able to do 180-degree shifts with their personality and reek havoc. It’s the same unpredictive behavior that tingles the mind, adds mystery and dynamic situations in love life.
Attractiveness and what we find desirable changes as we age, mature, and grow emotionally. While younger boys deem physical attributes attractive, mature men look for personality traits, stability, responsibility, comradery, and thoughtfulness within their potential partners. This is where both mature men and women see eye-to-eye. You want help, someone to keep you company, and someone you can count on to do something. In general, the key to a good relationship is basically communication and mutual understanding of desires. Understanding each other takes the gold medal in this contest because both partners need common ground and set goals to aim for, while bad communication, which leads to verbal fights, can be resolved due time while changing set goals have the potential to widen the gap between the spouses. This finding reminds me of friendships or formal dialogue, which can simulate dating in a novel. I used this once, and it worked well.
Overall, this was something I concluded while doing my research. I am not saying these things are true, but I find it interesting and helpful to fabricate a connection between people when I write my novels. Real-life is untested, and many things can happen, so control is an illusion and any bond you create with someone demands work and dedication. That one you can chisel in stone if you want. I’ll keep looking for more details and information I can find. It looks like my future novels are going to be more interesting and dramatic than before. And that’s a good thing in my book.
If you have some questions you’d like me to answer, leave them in the comments and I’ll try responding to them in length in my new blabbering post.