Critique Needed 6

As you know, I make this posts to see how much I’ve grown. Last night rant lead me to this post again. I wrote some good stories last month, so here they are, all open for critiquing and suggestion on how to grow even more. And remember, a writer can only grow if it has a feedback. In this regards, please take one more look at these stories and tell me your thoughts on them.

Metal Genes (Full)

Cyberpunk, thriller, mystery. – A cyborg fights crime and starts a rise of cyborgs.

Petrosian Boot camp

Pure fiction, military fiction. – A boy living through years of harsh training to become a soldier.

The third wave

Science fiction, alien, contemporary fiction. – A pair of civilian entrepreneurs are trying to get a deal with the army in repairing the destroyed building of an alien planet.


Cyberpunk, contemporary fiction, apocalypse. – A man is returning to his hometown, but there is no home anymore.


Cyberpunk, science fiction. – A man is tortured by the girlfriend’s trip away to another planet.

Colossal Havoc

Science fiction, contemporary fiction. – PTSD attacks a veteran in a segment of his life.

Few good days (Full)

Cyberpunk, science fiction, contemporary fiction. – A love story of two bioengineered female veteran soldiers.

Defending Peace

Futuristic, contemporary fiction. – Leaders of a country try to stop a war and a bloodshed.

Fog of war

Contemporary fiction, cyberpunk. – A lifetime of a war, seen from the eyes of a boy.


Cyberpunk, science fiction, mystery, dark humor. – A whistleblower faces the government’s wrath.

Drifting Shadow (Full)

Paranormal, science fiction, military fiction, contemporary fiction. – A team of agents recruiting new soldiers for crime fighting.

Other Future

Apocalypse, cyberpunk, science fiction. – A pair of soldiers take on a drone.

Ildock’s Black Ops

Epic fantasy. – Ildocians fight in the night.

New God

Science fiction, contemporary fiction. – Alien abduction.

Deep inside

Contemporary fiction. – A man fights his own problems and critique on society.

Steam dreams

Steampunk, science fiction. – A robot tries to be a rocket.

Mechanic Love

Cyberpunk, contemporary fiction. – A love story and broken heart.

Military, Academy, Poetry…

Contemporary fiction, military fiction. – A military school learns to write poems.

Roots of Zandor

Epic fantasy, military fiction, mystery. – A civilized coutnry meets their neighbours.


Cyberpunk, mystery, paranormal. – SWAT team gets under fire.


Let me simplify this for you. Just chose few stories you like, mention why you like it and pick few you didn’t liked. And also mention why. Also, don’t hold back from saying what you honestly think.


Facebook & Twitter social links where you can get my stories a lot faster and also enjoy my raw humor.

Stories? Look up.


29 thoughts on “Critique Needed 6

  1. Pingback: Night time blabbering 73 | Dronstad

  2. Pingback: Allow me to be me… – raynotbradbury

  3. I looked at the contemporary ‘Looking Inside’ – couple of minor spelling mistakes (suched for sucked; great for greet), but the big thing that missing is the fact the person telling the story is a soldier – Was a soldier. Maybe when he sees himself, can he relay how he felt the first time he put the uniform on, how smart it looked, how strong he felt, how much pride went into the shine and cut of it, and now … there is this person, not the real him at all.
    Just comments, my two bobs worth (and if you don’t understand Australian, that means either my two cents worth, or my opinion, for what it’s worth – and I prefer it to be worth 2 bob rather than 2 cents).

    Liked by 1 person

  4. I really enjoyed New God. Alien abduction is a fascinating topic to me. I think it would be great to expand upon this story about how people view God. As always, I love your stories and creativity. Please continue to write. Take care and have a wonderful day!

    Liked by 1 person

  5. I personally like the way you write and frame your words so I guess I like your each and every post. So, it’s difficult to choose among them. Keep posting! You write wonderfully well. 😄

    Liked by 1 person

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